I swear i'll be writing more in 2014

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

The Crouching Tiger Stance

It was Crouching Tiger: Hidden Dragon that brought back the karate movie.  In the late 90s, karate was nowhere.  Tarantino had been talking about Kill Bill and that film helped bring it back even more a few years later, but it was Ang Lee's masterpiece that led to things like Jackie Chan making a comeback, and a billion movies with karate scenes.  This movie was so good, that I actually played "Crouching Tiger" with one of my friends at a barbecue with some whiskey in us.  Oh, and that friend's name was Marisa, so it wasn't a dude.  I didn't know this in the year 2000, but it's probably not a good idea to play "Crouching Tiger" with a woman when alcohol is involved and you may or may not accidentally "sweep" the leg.  Honestly, I don’t remember any carnage, though Marisa may remember it differently.  Ahh, the year 2000 whiskey days …What I have learned though, is say you're drunk and you command "On Guard!" to someone, the way a samurai would to a worthy adversary, and smack them in face, that's fair game right?  Because you warned them? 

Back to "playing" Crouching Tiger.  Every now and then movies come out and you feel you have to imitate what you just saw, the whole monkey-see monkey-do thing.  Naturally, the term monkey is used because children do this much more than adults obviously (Crouching Tiger is a rare instance, but I'd hardly say I was an adult in the year 2000), and are little monkeys aside from the fact that they don't throw feces at you.  What I'm about to do, is list the movie's that can be "played", or were the best at after viewing, you immediately pulled off a move from the movie, like the aforementioned Crouching Tiger moves. 


The "Pleasure Principal"

So this isn't a movie, but if you've ever seen this Janet Jackson video, there's a move where she runs up to a chair, jumps on it and pushes it down with her legs without falling off.  Its fun, partly dangerous, and most importantly, do not try while drunk at a local bar. 


Eric Cartman loves to have friends over to his basement to play "Lambs" with him. 

Here are the Top Five From Childhood:

5.  Can You Hear This?  Want me to turn it up?

I'm not certain if Judd Nelson's Jon Bender created this in The Breakfast Club, but I do remember a time in life where everyone did it to each other in school because we were all so cool.  Nearly everything Bender did in this movie made its way to the schoolyard. 

4.  Crossing the Streams

This one has lasted into the adult years.  In Ghostbusters, we learned to never cross the streams unless you're fighting a huge marshmallow man.  Nowadays, instances pop up in life in which this expression is used.  I can't think of any off the top of my head, but probably when one is wiring, or using cables for some reason (i.e. in a recording studio or the like), the phrase "Don't cross the streams!" pops up. 

3.  The Top Gun Handshake

I must have written about this before.  I remember the way you gave someone a high five in 1986 was the same exact way as Goose and Mav did whilst homo-erotically playing volleyball.  Speaking of which, I recently saw this in HD and everyone is so SWEATY!  It's gross. 

2.  Daniel's Crane

Mr. Miyagi not only taught Ralph Macchio how to defeat Cobra Kai with one fancy kick, he taught all of us.  Granted, very few of us ever connected on one of our friends with it, but we tried. 

1.  The Light Saber Fight

Who didn't have a light saber fight as a kid?  More importantly, as children, who didn't have a light saber pee fight with one of their friends?  

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