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Monday, May 11, 2009

The 12 Angriest Men of All-Time

Raise your hand if a government teacher once made you watch this?  This would be quite the boring flick if it weren't for Lee Cobb, who's one of the best angry actors ever.  So to honor Lee Cobb, and his roles in films such as this and "On the Waterfront" ...

The Top 12 Angriest Movie Characters of All-Time.

12.  Lee Cobb as Johnny Friendly in On the Waterfront

The first great mob boss character I've seen in film.   He's got the classic "uptight old white man" thing going on.  

11.  Coked Up Dirk Diggler from Boogie Nights

Marky Mark starts out that movie as the nice innocent kid and falls all the way down to the point where he's arguing with Jack Horner, "YOU'RE NOT THE BOSS OF ME!!! I AM THE BOSS OF ME!!!  It's my dream to get to use that in a real life argument.

10.  Johnny from The Karate Kid

The vendetta he has against Daniel is nearly unmatched in the sense that really, he just never leaves the kid alone.  I like that though.  Next time someone goes after I girl I like, I'm going to unleash the Cobra Khai on him.  That'll learn'em.  Now taking applications for Zach's Cobra Khai.

9.  Daniel Plainview from There Will Be Blood

It's funny, his role as Bill the Butcher is so much eviler, but without greed, he's not nearly as angry as this character.   Greed anger is not a healthy one.

8.  Vito from Do the Right Thing

Many characters from this one.  I could've used Sal, Radio Raheem and especially Buggin' Out, whose name even says anger.  In fact, it's really a tie because both of their hatreds are formed out of prejudice, which is we all known as racism.  Meh.

7.  Judge Smails from Caddyshack

Unbelievable rage.  If this wasn't a comedy, I'd probably have rated him higher because getting under his skin seems about as hard as breathing.  

6.  Sonny Corleone from The Godfather

That famous temper of his gets him to #6.  

5.  Jake LaMotta in Raging Bull

Dude beats his wife, his brother, has that beautiful paranoia and his life progressively gets worse to the point where he's put in solitary and continually bangs his head into the wall.  That's pretty hard to top.

4.  Tommy from Goodfellas

I'd put him higher if he didn't seem to enjoy his mean streak so much.  He enjoys it so much, it's like he's not even angry, except for the fact that he's so angry, he enjoys being evil so much.  Get that?

3.  Stanley Kowalski from A Streetcar Named Desire

Man oh man, classic "wife-beater" anger.  Mix that in with gambling, alcohol, poverty and having to live in New Orleans and you have one pissed off dude.

2.  Jack Torrance from The Shining

It's kind of not fair because he's possessed.  Or is he?  What's great about this character, is he was kind of pissed off before they even got to the hotel.  That's the thing about madness, all you need is a little push.  Well, I don't think he even needed the push.  He pretended the ghosts of the house were getting to him just so he could take an axe to that annoying wife and kid of his.  If you had that wife, raise your hand if you'd do the same thing.

1.  Beatrix Kiddo a.k.a. The Bride a.ka. Black Mamba a.ka. Mommy from Kill Bill

Yes, a woman is #1 on my angriest man list.  In the words of the little person, "That bitch is furious"

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