I swear i'll be writing more in 2014

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

The Walking Continues

That's the go-to joke for people who don't like Lord of the Rings.  The Two Towers continues the walking of course, but it all leads up to the wonderful battle of Helm's Deep, which leads us to Return of the King that has considerably less walking.  In fact, that one is an entire 3 hour battle, with the best "I don't know how to end this movie" ending ever.  As bad as the multiple endings were, I don't think it ruined the trilogy at all.  It's still probably better than an Ewok party, though that's a tough call. 

A few more points on this one:

  • Frodo turns into a Chris Farleyesque bumbling idiot in this one.  I know the ring of power is a tremendous weight for him to carry, but he finds himself in trouble too much. 
  • I don't like how the Elves flee.  There's the one tribe that helps in the battle of Helm's Deep, but the main tribe runs away to Never Never Land.  I never understood that.  It's as if evil represents Terrorism or whatever the hip anti-western culture is of the time, and "Man" closest to Mt. Doom is the United States, the other group of man that helps in the final battle is England, and the elves that flee are France. 
  • I'd love to have a "forbidden" something.  When the knights say "He entered the forbidden pool and the punishment is death", is he just fucking with him, or does one label something forbidden and walla?  If I was hanging out with friends and I labeled a beer as forbidden, would that give the group of us the right to start wailing on him?  "Uh, you drank the forbidden beer!  The punishment is that you have to go get us more!"
  • In terms of Gandalf dying, if everyone thinks you're dead, and you reemerge with horrible news to tell everyone, aren't you better off dead?  Like Lane Myer? 

I'm going to save everything else for Return of the King.  Walking …

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